Postpartum for pregnancy loss and release

Pregnancy loss and release are among the most unspoken, avoided, and under-supported experiences in a woman’s life. And yet, so many women go through them. Loss may come as a choice to release a pregnancy, either early on or later into the pregnancy, or it can be a sudden, unexpected event, occurring early on or at full term. Women experience and feel this loss in countless ways, and no two journeys are the same.

I want to start a conversation about this so that, if you are going through it, or have gone through it without the support you needed, you know that you deserve to be recognized and held during this time.

A woman innately understands life as much as she understands death. That’s because death can physically reside within her body. A real, living part of her can grow and transform into life, yet can also manifest as death. All loss is loss, and all of these women are mothers. Every mother deserves care, nourishment, and recognition in these huge, transformative moments of her life.

Supporting women through death and holding space for them during this time is one of the most healing practices we can offer, not just for individual women, but for all women.

Art work by

Why Physical Nourishment Matters

During loss, a woman’s physical health is often overlooked, but it plays a critical role in her recovery and emotional well-being. In Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), conception and loss draw on two important factors:

• Jing: This vital life essence is a mother’s most precious resource, passed to her child during pregnancy. The process of conception and loss draws deeply on Jing, leaving a woman physically and energetically depleted. A woman’s personal Jing reserves and overall health determine how deeply the experience will impact her. With nourishment and care, Jing can be replenished, and balance can return.

• Yin and Yang Balance: During pregnancy, the baby’s Yang energy, the warm, active force of life, balances the mother’s Yin nature, which is cooling, nurturing, and grounding. When pregnancy ends, this balance is disrupted. The sudden absence of Yang energy can leave a woman feeling cold, drained, and emotionally vulnerable.

This imbalance is natural, and with proper nourishment, rest, and support, a mother’s body can heal and find equilibrium again.

Supportive Tools

Five Pillars of Support During Loss

Healing after loss requires more than time; it requires intention. How we care for ourselves in this moment shapes how we move forward. These five pillars can provide a framework for support:

1. Ritual:
   Rituals are an ancient and universal human practice, offering structure and meaning during life’s profound moments. They help us navigate change, mark transitions, and process what words alone cannot express.A ritual can literally be anything, it is simply an intention behind an action. Lighting a candle, holding a ceremony, naming the baby, or creating an offering can help you acknowledge the significance of your loss and honor this moment.

1. Food:
   Warm, easy to digest foods replenish Yin and Blood reserves, helping the body recover from depletion. Think broths, stews, and herbal teas that warm and soothe. The stage of pregnancy at the time of loss will influence the type of nourishment your body needs. Working with an experienced practitioner can help you create a personalized plan for support.

2. Warmth:
   Warmth is essential for healing, particularly for the womb. Practices like applying a warm compress, keeping your feet and lower back warm, or womb steaming can gently restore balance and comfort. However, avoid warming practices like steaming or moxibustion during active blood loss.

3. Rest:
   Rest is vital for rebuilding Jing and Qi, both of which are drawn upon heavily during pregnancy. Rest doesn’t have to look one way, it’s about finding what feels supportive to you: Gentle Movement, Quiet time with a warm drink, Creative outlets, Connection, Yoga Nidra are all great ways to help feel rested. Limiting screen time and creating a nurturing environment can also help promote the natural release of oxytocin; the hormone that fosters connection and emotional grounding and is essential during this time.

4. Connection:
   Loss can feel isolating, but sharing your experience with someone you trust, whether a friend, partner, or professional, can bring comfort. Talking openly can help release some of the emotional weight and remind you that you are not alone.

Creating a World of Support

It is crucial that we create a change around this narrative so women don’t experience this time alone and under-supported. I encourage you to open up the conversation with the people you love and gently inquire if they have ever experienced this. Make sure you, and the women in your life feel resourced in every way possible should this happen.

Whether you’re navigating this yourself or supporting someone you love, care and connection are essential. Together, we can create a world where women don’t live their most intimate and vulnerable moments alone.

If you would like more personalised support for yourself, a friend, or a partner, please reach out.